One True Soul Mate Not Biblical? Fairy Tale?

And they lived happily ever after.”

It’s been a long time since I read a fairy tale. So I had to pick up a children’s book to make sure the "happily ever after" ending was still there. Although many of the stories have been revised, the fairy tales still convey the same message. 1-There is only one true soul mate. 2-Only when you find your soul mate, you will find true happiness.

One of my best girlfriends— who loved reading romantic novels—believed this concept for years. I’m not sure it was her studying the Word more in depth or her last relationship ending in marriage, which helped her see clearer. The truth is you can be compatible with more than one person.

Is your belief in the "Soul Mate-Only One" myth keeping you from leaving a dating relationship that's not good for you? Or is this belief keeping you from looking at new dating relationships because you feel you lost the “right” one—your soul mate?

"A 'soul mate' is not a Christian idea," says biblical counselor June Hunt, founder, CEO, and CSO of Hope For The Heart ministries. “Rather, an ancient Greek philosopher, Plato, taught that men and women were made in one body, but separated by the gods. Each man and woman scours the earth for their perfect spouse, so the two can again become one. Phrases like "my other half" or "my better half" actually come from this Greek myth.”

Hunt's comments are not only enlightening but are in agreement with Colossians 2:10. "And you are complete in him, which is the head of all principality and power." We are complete in Christ. We don't search the world looking for our other half because we are complete in Christ!

What are your thoughts about the true soul mate myth?





Older Women Marry Out of Sheer Luck or Manipulation???

Image courtesy of Stuart Miles at FreeDigitalPhotos.net

A few years ago, I commented in a leading Christian magazine about marrying later. Another reader responded:

“It's not impossible, but if one is being honest, one has to admit that it is rare. Statistically, the older a woman is the more the odds are against her...particularly if she wants a Christian mate. Most churches have a surplus of single women of a certain age, but relatively fewer available men, and the ones who are all too often act like the proverbial rooster in the hen house. I've seen it, and it's not pretty. Women who marry older often times it's just out of sheer luck...or manipulation. That's the truth.”

I agree with the reader on several points BUT. First, let's see what I agree with her on :

Most churches have more women than men.
In David Murrow’s book Why Men Hate Going to Church, he writes, “I truly believe women must play a key role if men are to return (to the church). Because women dominate in attendance, leadership, and volunteerism, they hold great sway in the local church (even if they don’t realize it). Women must humble themselves, pray, and allow the men of the church to lead the body toward an adventure.” For more interesting points on men and church, check out this link: http://churchformen.com

The proverbial rooster in the hen (church) house does exist.
I agree with the reader that because of the surplus of single women of a certain age and fewer available men, many brothers act like the proverbial rooster in the hen house. Unfortunately, we, the church, have accepted this behavior, which is both sickening and sinful.

Main point of disagreement:

Older women who marry, marry out of sheer luck or manipulation.
 Unfortunately, this statement assumes that the only thing women have to offer is their youth and that luck does exist.  Both of which we know is in error.

While statistics may be against us, I know other women who married at a later age and they did not manipulate their potential mates. I know it’s difficult, but I encourage my single sisters to keep believing. If God can part the Red Sea for Moses, He can send you a mate…if it’s His will!