It's been nearly 2 years since I last blogged on this site. Although my other website InSeason Mom has had most of my attention, like your first crush, Marrying Over 40 has never left my mind.
When I was in college, a Christian friend asked if I thought it was right to pray for a particular Christian man to become her husband. Immediately, I said yes. After all, she knew the man. She knew his good points and bad points. She knew what would make her happy. Why not tell God that you wanted this man to be your husband. The years have given me wisdom and I would answer her differently today.
When I was in my 20s and 30s, I thought every Christian and non-Christian that I dated more than once was "the one" or could be the one for me. Interestingly, one of "the Christian ones" who I thought was for me wasn't. The "thought one for me" was active in the church, in my circle of friends, and was an attractive yuppie ( a term used in the 1980s to describe a young urban professional or young upwardly mobile professional). I was the one he would always ask to take to his company functions. How could he not be "the one" God had for me?
When he mysteriously quit his job and returned hometown to live with his parents, I was baffled. I tried to contact him. I asked our circle of friends if they knew anything. No one did. A few years later, I received a call from one of his relatives. My friend was in the hospital and wanted to see me. Talking with my dear friend on his dying bed, I learned that he had AIDS/HIV. He was too ashamed to tell me when he found out. He had contacted AIDS through promiscuous sexual behavior. I thought back to conversations when he asked me about God and homosexuality. I had failed to "listen" to his cry for help. I only saw a potential husband for me.
God knew when I was "pray-matchmaking" myself with my friend, I was looking at one speck of the picture. He could see the whole picture. When I was a single, I hated when people would say "wait on the Lord for a husband." How many of them have "waited on the Lord" for a husband? Now I know whether these well-meaning people have waited on the Lord is irrelevant, they are right!